Some random Tuesday thoughts . . .

Saying Goodbye to Babies

We got rid of the bassinet this weekend.

We haven't used it in over two years, but it had sat in our bedroom -- a catchall for various things. But we finally got around to taking it apart (one step in my goal of sorting through all the old baby stuff we still have hanging around).

And as glad as I am to be finally putting it away, it made me a little sad, too.

There are so many days that I'm ready for my kids to be just a little bit older, more independent.

I'd love to be able to take an uninterrupted shower. Luke's making great progress on potty training, and I'm eagerly looking forward to the day when diapers are a thing of the past. And, I love the fact that Ashley has finally gotten to an age where she can get up on a Saturday morning, find herself something appropriate to eat and entertain herself for an hour or so before I get out of bed.

But some days I miss my babies. And they do seem to grow up so fast.

As I was disassembling the bassinet, Luke asked what I was doing. I told him I was taking it apart and putting it away because we don't have babies anymore.

And because Luke is very proud of being a "big boy" now, he said to me several times throughout the day, "We don't have babies anymore."

No, we don't have babies anymore.

Sometimes I really miss those babies.

This post is shared on Your Life, Your Blog @ Real Life Blog

As I Was Saying

I’m no longer shocked when I hear my mother’s words come out of my mouth.

I have learned to accept that it’s just one of those things that happens when you have kids – for better or for worse, you find parts of your mother that make their way into your parenting.

But I am still shocked when I hear my words come out of my children’s mouths. (Usually because the words that make their way out of my children’s mouths are the ones that I’m least proud of.)

At two and a half, Luke has quite an accomplished vocabulary – but there are times it seems much of it (maybe too much on some days) comes from me.

There are ones that are kind of cute (and that show off my good Mommy side): “Good job, Mommy!” or “I did a really good job!” or “I’m a snazzy dude!”

And there are the playful ones: “Okey dokey artichokey” and “See you later alligatordile” (His unique blend of the “later alligator, after while crocodile” routine.

But then there are several that make me cringe (at least a little):

• When we’re stopped in traffic, he often yells from the back seat: “Come on, peoples!” or “Get out of my way peoples!” Guess I’m a little impatient in the car sometimes. Although, in my defense, I’m glad he spends more time in the car with me than with his dad (whose language when driving is slightly more colorful than mine).
• 
  
  Speaking of colorful language, Luke has picked up a couple of colorful phrases. I’ve never been a big swearer, and I’ve made a conscious effort at monitoring my language since I’ve had children. (Okay, if I’m honest, since Ashley was Luke’s age and chose to use a couple of not so nice words.) But, Luke gives me occasional reminders that I need to be a little more vigilant.
• “Get in time out, NOW.” I may once have worried about Luke’s ability to stand up to Ashley, but he is rapidly showing that he can hold his own with his big sister. He relishes telling her to go to time out – and he has mastered the “I’m so frustrated I’m ready to scream” tone of voice. (Oops...)

• In the midst of my usual morning routine of herding distractible children to the car, I said to both of them: “Stop playing around and get to the car right now.” Luke turned to me and with a concerned look said “Mommy, are you crazy?” This is because when I get really frustrated at them, I say “you are making me crazy.” (Not my proudest Mommy moment, but it does slip out from time to time.) I guess on that particular morning I was using my “you’re making me crazy” tone of voice.

Oh, the things children teach us. Maybe I should go ponder ways to change my language.

2009 Photo Faves

It's kind of fun to go back through the last year's worth of photos and remember some of our fun times. Here are some of my favorites from last year.

These first two, we took at Target with the kids. We let them try on hats and sun glasses. They had a great fun with their "modeling" stint.

Yes, I suppose this means we have a somewhat boring life. But you take your entertainment where you can get it.

I think this one is very sweet.

Ashley had a blast decorating Easter eggs. She's quite creative and loves to do "crafts," so this was a big thrill for her. And she was quite proud to do them all by herself.

This is one of my favorite photos of Luke. After a busy day on vacation, he fell asleep on the way to the car with his brand new bear. The bear has become his very best friend and favorite snuggly.

This picture is the wallpaper for my computer and everytime Luke sees it he says, "My bear is asleep just like me."

Doesn't that face say it all? Sheer joy on the merry-go-round at the fair.

My little sheep from the Christmas pageant at church. I love the pensive look.

See more great photos from other bloggers at

Ten Great Things About the Start of the New Year

1. SCHEDULES!!! I have a great job with lots and lots of time off around the holidays. And it was lots of fun and a great break, but I'm glad we're back to our regular schedules. Anyone with young kids knows they thrive on schedules and routines. A couple of weeks out of the regular routine was tiring for all of us. It feels good to be back to our normal routine.

2. Longer Days: Living up north has made me attuned to the shrinking daylight of the late fall. It's still dark before 5 now, but it takes a little bit longer each day for the darkness to take over. And I know in a few weeks, we'll be able to see a few slivers of light at 5 and beyond.

3. Healthy Food: I love holiday food, and I've pretty much given up on trying to resist the many goodies that crop up between Thanksgiving and Christmas. But now that the holidays are officially over, it's good to get back to more healthy eating habits. At this point, I don't even miss the sugar all that much.

4. A Fresh Start: I love the sense of promise the New Year holds with its emphasis on resolutions. So, yes, there will be the usual eat less, exercise more, lose weight, yell less at the kids, be a better person type resolutions. And some of them will fall by the wayside, I'm sure. But I like the feeling that I've got the chance to "start over" with all those areas in my life that I know need some work.

5. New Additions to the Wardrobe -- thanks to Christmas presents.

6. New books (both mine and the kids) -- again, thanks to Christmas presents.

7. Snowmen: We haven't built one yet (although we do now have lots of snow), but there is a little snowman family down the road from us that makes me smile everytime I drive by it. And, we've got plenty of snow, so I'm sure we'll have our own little snowman (or two or three) soon.

8. Winter Comforts -- warm fires on snowy afternoons, a mug of cocoa, hot tea, warm cider.

9. The Promise of Spring: Okay, I know that it's still four or five months away, but it's closer than it was a month ago.

10. We're that much closer to putting two-year-old temper and opposition behind us! While I know every age has it's challenges, I have to say that the second time through "the terrible twos" is just a little more tiring than I remember. I'm ready for a little less screaming and a little more cooperation.

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Remembering 2009.

One of my favorite year-end rituals is going back through the year just passed.

I go back through my calendar to transfer birthdays -- and inevitably end up looking at other entries on the calendar and remembering some of the events of the past year.

And I do engage in the tradition of setting New Year's resolutions -- not always a successful venture, but it's an acknowledgement of the fact that there are goals I'd like to work toward. Heck, sometimes I even manage to meet one or two of them, but it's always interesting to look back at the goals for the year before and to remember what seemed important at the beginning of the previous year.

And, before I record my new resolutions in my journal, I always read back through the entries from the past year. I'm often amazed at how things (both good and bad) that seemed so important at the time I recorded them have faded into a distant memory. I think that's a good lesson -- both in how all bad things eventually pass and in how hard it is for us to remember to treasure the good times.

So, the 2009 Blog Recap Carnival from the blog Musings of a Housewife seemed a great way to take a quick look at my blog for the past year.

So, I'm including the first line of the first post of each month for the past year. (Well, except for those months when things got busy and I didn't quite get around to blogging -- that's one of those new year's resolutions -- to blog on a more consistent schedule (like maybe at least weekly) this year!)

I've linked back to the original post in case you missed it, or want to re-read it.

JANUARY
"But I don't like timeout!" Ashley shouts from the step where she has been sent after throwing a toy across the room because she was told she could not watch television.

Some things don't change much in a year! Ashley still has quite a temper (and still argues about being sent to timeout). Although, she is less inclined to throw things now, and more likely to stomp her feet or simply argue (often quite loudly). I suppose that's an improvement.

Although, this post was really about Luke's newly discovered temper. And a year later, he has definitely mastered the art of the temper tantrum -- although, he still is more compliant than Ashley when he's angry.

FEBRUARY
Oops . . .  that was one of those months when I just didn't seem to get around to posting.

MARCH
We have -- finally -- reclaimed our bed.

It doesn't seem possible that it's been a whole year since Ashley began sleeping in her own bed. Of course, it was only a short time later that Luke began making the nightly journey to our bed. And, I struggled with that for a while because I know Ashley felt very left out. But, then again, Luke was not even 2, and I wasn't quite ready to draw the line with him.

But, we have, once again reclaimed our bed.

Last week, we began telling Luke he had to sleep in his own bed. The first night was awful . . . he and I made many trips back to his room, accompanied by much sobbing and wailing on his part. (The timing of our decision was deliberate -- I had lots of time off work, so I figured if I wasn't sleeping at night, at least I'd be able to nap.)  But Luke has adjusted fairly well after that first night. We've had an occassional teary moment, but mostly he has delighted in telling me that he is a big boy because he sleeps in his bed.

APRIL
Oops . . .  Another one of those blogless months.

MAY
Ashley has been excited for Mother's Day to arrive since last weekend when she went shopping for her father for Mother's Day gifts.

This was a post of a variety of reflections on Mother's Day . . . thoughts about my children's birthmother, about my parenting style, and the ways motherhood has changed me.

JUNE
Hmmm. . . . there seems to be a pattern here for my ability to maintain a blogging schedule. Although, I'm happy to say that June was the last month that I didn't find time to do at least one post.

JULY
My "baby" turned 2 today.

Oh, dear, this one makes me a little teary just reading it. And, now, as he'll proudly tell you, he is 2 1/2. Where does the time go?

AUGUST
I think I'm fairly technically literate.

This post was prompted by an article about what parents do and don't know about the online lives of their children. Mine are still too young for this to be a big issue in our household, but I do sometimes wonder how I'll manage limit setting in a high tech world with children who may be more savvy than I am.

SEPTEMBER
It's definitely beginning to seem like fall here in New England.

This is one of those posts that made me smile just to look at it again. There were several photos of the kids at the fair, and just seeing the pictures brought back memories of that fun day!

OCTOBER
I don't often get to talk about my job.

I wrote this post about the program I work in at a social service agency. The program serves a group of young mothers in poverty and this year, the moms started a blog (http://www.familieslearningtogether.net/).

NOVEMBER
The kids and I stopped at a local diner for lunch yesterday.

I had forgotten all about this post, but it was definitely worth re-reading for it'slesson in finding the good in life and being grateful for what we have, rather than always wishing for things to be different.

DECEMBER
"I want to see Christmas."

This was a frequent refrain in our house this holiday season -- and it helped me look for Christmas in our day-to-day life.

Happy 2010!!

This post is shared on Real Life's Your Life Your Blog

Christmas Lessons

It's hard to teach the real meaning of Christmas to children -- especially to a 2 and a 5 year old.

In our house, we have lots of talk about Santa Claus and opening presents. Ashley seems to have the never-ending list of all the things she hopes she gets for Christmas. Luke is fascinated by decorations -- ours and those he sees as we're out driving.

We also try to have some conversation about why we celebrate Christmas. We're doing a nightly Advent meditation and prayer. And we talk about how Christmas is Jesus' birthday (which does excite my kids, especially Luke, but I think only because they associate birthdays with presents and cake).

So today I was pleasantly surprised when Ashley brought me her latest Play Doh creation.

It's the baby Jesus in his manger. And she told me the story of how Jesus was born in the manger because there was no room anywhere else.

Then she added some hay (the yellow around the manger) and a star (the blue on baby Jesus' chest).

Then she added a snail to be one of the animals watching over the baby. And even though I've somehow missed the story of the snail in the manager, that doesn't mean there wasn't one there. Then she added the gold for his present (along with a pink star in the center).

At this point, I was feeling pretty proud. She has been listening to the stories she hears from us and in Sunday School. And even though she can manage to display rampant materialism on a regular basis, maybe, just maybe, she's understanding a little bit of the real Christmas story, too.

Of course, then she added a volcano to her manager scene. But, I'm still hoping a little bit of the true meaning of Christmas is sinking in.